'Time heals all wounds.'

 It has been said, 'time heals all wounds.' I do not agree. The wounds remain. In time, the mind, protecting its sanity, covers them with scar tissue and the pain lessens. But it is never gone.

Rose Kennedy

When does the mind allow the insanity to take over?  Is there a point when your mind gives in to the insanity just to keep going.  Just to breathe again, to be happy again, to keep the tears from falling?  Is there a fine line in between?  How long can you go with that safety wall wrapped around your heart.  Especially when it gets holes poked in daily.  Those holes are poked by conversations of our daily lives as it is today. As a matter of fact I had someone to ask be today if I cry at funerals?  How do you answer that when you've just lost your only daughter?  You can't speak because if you do, you will fall apart.

I know life goes on.  It goes on whether I want it to or not.  And there are many days that I don't want it to go on.  I want to go back, go back to save Em.  To get to that one moment where I can change the road and ver her to the road to stay alive.  It's that one second I just want back.  I want to see her smile when she first saw Cam.  I want to see Kase's smile when he see his Em.  It's not fair for a 6yr old to go through that pain of losing someone so close.  I can't explain my hurt, how is he supposed to understand.

I push our story in hopes to help some other family from going through this pain.  In doing that, I relive every moment of our pain.  

I pray that when you read this, you won't have sympathy for us.  I pray that you will act so that you don't have to go through what we have been through.  This COVID pandemic is not over.  Good hospitals are barring families to advocate for their loved ones.  Many of you trust the healthcare system just like we did.  Please don't think our story won't be yours.

Em loved life and we loved Em.